My Resolve

This is not a New Year's resolution. It's a life resolution that happens to be occuring right now, near New Year. Justin and I have hit a wall when it comes to conceiving a child. I've been pretty quiet about it and only letting a few friends know what's been going on. Most, including my parents, don't even know we were trying. Ware at the point where we need to take the next step, but my weight won't permit it. It's unclear if my weight is causing our current problems. While I may have symtoms of PCOS which can be caused/helped by weight, I am not insulin resistant so I cannot be treated with medication they normally use. The only treatment available to me is fertility drugs, but at my current weight my doctor doesn't feel comfortable giving them to me. I agree with her 100%. It is almost unethical for her to help me conceive when I and my child are at risk for so many complications.

This is not a surprise to me at all and something I've known in the back of my mind for some time. Even before we started trying I started Weight Watchers, knowing that my weight may cause issues or complicate them. I was successful on Weight Watchers, having lost close to 40 pounds. Since August of 2008 I've put about 30 pounds back on. This may have caused my fertility issues to worsen, but that's really a moot point. I need to lose weight. I need to lose almost 100 pounds. I need to do this. If it helps me conceive naturally, that's great. If it makes my doctor more comfortable and Justin and I are able to take the next step and receive medical assistance that's also great. In the end, I will be healthy and I have a better chance of carrying a healthy baby.

I just wish that I'd stuck with Weight Watchers when I began it in 2008. I'd be at my goal of 100 pounds lost by now. I lost enough to make me feel "okay" and then I got impatient. Justin and I bought a house and I was ready to put a baby in it. We started trying and I stopped trying to lose weight. A year and a half later, I still need to lose the weight, I'm not pregnant, and I have a long journey ahead of me. I'm really angry at myself. It's my own fault. I'm not stupid. I knew that my weight would be an issue, one way or another.

All the beating myself up won't help the situation, so instead I'm being proactive. Justin and I are going to stop trying for about a year. I could still try to conceive on my own, but it's just not a good option for me. I have to either go all out tyring--temping, checking fertility signs, charting--or go back on the pill. There's no "wait and see" with me. I don't ovulate regularly, so I'd be taking a pregnancy test every time I turned around if I didn't track my cycles via charts. I can't put myself through another year of charts. It drives me nuts. How Catholics do it, I'll never know! Maybe it's easier if you're always a 31 day girl. I'm more of a 50, 67, 94, 38 day cycle kind of girl. I'd also like to go back on the pill because I feel very off with such erratic cycles. I have terrible acne, PMS, and cramps. I seriously feel like I'm 15 again. Plus, I think taking conception off the table completely will help me psychologically. My resolve to lose weight started to waiver when we actively started trying.

Step two of being proactive is Weight Watchers. I've signed back up for Weight Watchers online and I vow to follow the program. My friend Sarah is also getting back on the program and we are going to keep eachother honest and meet up once a week to check in. The program works, I know it does, I just have to do the program. I'm also going to resurrect the video program Justin and I did in the fall. We were hardcore into it for 30 of the 90 days. Then we fell off the wagon. But starting the first of the year, I'm going to follow WW and then do the 90 day workout. I expect to have really great results with combining the two. It'll be a great way to jump start myself and make my goal seem attainable.

The final part of my proactive plan is the Dave Ramsey plan. Dave's plan is a debt elimination plan. Again, Justin and I started this a year ago and had some success. Like with weight loss, we got rid of enough debt to feel more comfortable month to month. The more comfortable we felt, the less we worried about our debt. But as any parent will tell you, babies are expensive. Why not take this break from trying and use it to finish the Dave Ramsey plan? We've (re)completed step one of the plan and are ready to move onto the next part. Being debt free, or close to it, will make adding to our family that much easier. Like the CPA, being debt free will make my career options more numerous.

That's the plan. Go back on the pill, lose the weight, pay off some bills, and finish the program at Columbus State. I have given it a year, but it might take less time, it might take more time. We will have to wait and see. I feel good about our plan, and I will be updating my progress I'm sure. I debated on blogging about this, but it can only make me more accountable. You hear that? It's your job to keep me honest!

Four Days

There are four days until Christmas. Three and half to be exact. Two and a half until Chirstmas Eve. I got a lot of things done this weekend, which was good because I was behind. I guess if it's done by Christmas it's not really behind, but behind the schedule I'd set for myself at least.

There's just a few things left to do. I need to bake gingersnaps, sugar cookies, and make fudge. I need to make up a platter for work and also baggies for work. I need to make three cookie plates for three of our neighbors. I also need to wrap two last minute gifts. Finally, I need to go buy the standing rib roast for Thursday.

I've yet to buy the roast because I want it to be fresh obviously. Also, I'm a bit intimidated to go to the butcher and select one. I've been debating between the butcher in Reynoldsburg or the meat counter at Andersons. I know that it's their job to help you select meat and to trim it/prepare it the way you ask, but I feel like I'm putting them out or something. I don't know where this comes from in me. I'm afraid to ask someone to go out of their way for me (in this case, not even out of the way, just do their job). Maybe it's the years I spent working retail, even though I was usually happy to provide excellent customer service. Maybe it's just the way I was raised. I was taught to not make waves and to follow the rules to a T. When all else fails blame your parents!

In any case, I am pretty much ready for Christmas. A few loose ends and of course the cooking of the dinner, but I enjoy that part.

I'm really looking forward to what is happening after Chirstmas. I begin two online classes at Columbus State January 4th. I'm starting a program that's a certificate of accounting. It's designed to give those who have a bachelor's degree the accounting knowledge and credit hour requirements to sit for the CPA exam. It's only a six quarter program, and I plan on going during summer quarter as well. Given this, I'll be done with it in sometime in 2011. What I do as a CPA, I'm not sure yet, but it will give me options. I can try to use it with my current company, I can take it elsewhere, I can start a freelance service. The possibilities, though not endless, are numerous.

December is here!

I'm so happy that the holidays are here! I wasn't really eagerly anticipating them because they actually snuck up on me this year, but I'm happy they're here nonetheless. I love the holidays-- friends, family, great food, Chirstmas decoratations, shopping, gift giving. It's all so much fun. Here's a quick run down of what I'm doing and how I'm preparing.

• Our tree is up and we have lights on the house. This year I have our traditional tree, which is a hand me down tree from my mom. My aunt Joyce bought it end of season from a specialty shop years ago. It's a five foot tree that looks supre full and realistic. Since I'm allergic to pine, this forever green tree is the closest I'll get to the real thing. We've also put up a small three foot table top tree with all my Wizard of Oz ornaments. I've amassed quite the collection of Dorothies, Scarecrows, Tinmen, Lions, Totos, and witches. They took over our tree last year, so this year they get their own, be it sparsely covered, tree. More Wizard of Oz ornaments welcome *hint-hint* We've took our normal decor off the ledge above the front door and replaced it with seasonal items, and we've bought garland to do up there, we just need to borrow a ladder to place it up there properly. We hung icicle lights outside on the porch and got a little light up penguin that is sitting on the porch pot. We put bows on the porch columns and one on the EVANS solar light spindell thing. In all, the house if very festive and pretty. It's amazing how much Christmas decor can make a home feel that much more "homey."
• I'm mulling around what holiday baking I'd like to do. I'll do the usual fantasy fudge and almond shortbread thumbprints. Last year I did spritz cookies, but they weren't such a hit on the tray I brought to work. I think they're good, especially with coffee or a glass of milk, plus the recipe makes a ton so they're good filler as it were. So maybe I'll do them, maybe I won't. Kroger has the same large rolls of Pillsbury dough for $2.50 again this year. I hate shortcutting like that, but at that price you can't beat the convenience. I'll buy the gingerbread and make gingersnaps again and probably the peanut butter to make kiss cookies. Justin will want chocolate chip cookies, so I'll make some of those, but keep them at home. Every year I plan to make buckeyes, but I never do. Maybe this year will be the year I finally do it. Mom gave me a quick and dirty buckeye recipe that I might do to simplify.
• Grandma and I did a little craft project while I was home a few weeks ago. I'd love to share what I did, but I'm afraid some of the recipients will read this and it will spoil the gift. I had fun beading with Grandma and the final product turned out probably better than I thought. I plan on giving them to my small group and people at the office.
• Justin and I are almost done with our shopping. We have a few gifts here and there to buy and we need to nail down what we're getting a few people, but for the most part shopping is done.
• I've brought my Christmas cards to work to get them signed. I will address them over the next few days and hope to get to the post office for stamps so I can get them mailed this weekend.
• Also this weekend, my mom and dad are coming down to celebrate my birthday. See, my birthday is part of the holiday season as well, so I get an extra special bonus! Justin's company has a large surplus store with restaurant equipment and smallwares. We get a discount normally, but this weekend we get an extra discount as a holiday gift. I love kitchen things as does my mom, so that's how we plan to spend Saturday. I have things to pick up in preparation for:
• Hosting Christmas Eve dinner! I'm all about starting new traditions now that I'm married, so this year I had the idea of doing a meal with Justin's family and it was decided that Chrstimas Eve was the best time. Justin's family is very into the opening of presents on Christmas morning, so we'll keep that tradition the same, but on Christmas Eve, they usually just watch a movie and eat cheese, crackers, and summer sausage. This year, they will come to our house and dine on prime rib (one of Justin's favorite things) and LOTS of side dishes. It's not a meal unless you have more side dishes than the number of guests. That's the Hickey/Cowley rule. I guess it might be the Ray Hickey Method of holiday meals LOL! I've never done a prime rib before, but I've done some reading and I'm confident that I can make a good one.
• I also want to persuade everyone to go to our church's late night Christmas Eve service. I loved going to church on Christmas Eve as a kid and lighting the candles and singing Silent Night. Plus, it puts the holiday back into perpective at least temporarily. Chirstmas after all is about the birth of Christ and God's gift to us. Even if I go by myself, I'm going. And when we have kids, I will take them.
• We currently have no plans for New Year, and I'm okay with that. If we get invited to a party, we'll go. If we go to a friends' house, we'll go. If we go over to my in-laws we'll go. I'm not hosting anything and I don't mind if what I do is small.

That's my December in a nut shell. We've been invited to some holiday parties that I'd like to attend if it fits into our schedule. And I'm sure invitations to this that and the other will crop up throughout the month. This time if year is one that I don't mind being busy!

I'm Thankful For

I'd be super thankful if my boss would let me leave right now, but it doesn't look like he's going to. I'm currently done with everything I needed to do today and am answering the phones. That is, if they were actually ringing, which they aren't. Oh well, I will kill time with this.

This year I am thankful for:

My Loving Husband
He's just as sweet and lovable as he ever was, maybe more. We've been married for a couple days shy of two and half years now, and I can't imagine life without him. It's amazing how nicely we've fallen into our roles as husband and wife. I love him and everything he does for me.

Our House
We've been in our house a year and half, and it's really truely become our home. Milo and Maggie, dinners around the table, new drapes, wicker chairs on the porch, evenings spent watching TV, all of this is home to me. I love it!

Our Church
This year, we finally buckled down and found a church home. We began attending Peace United Methodist during Lent, and it has been a great fit. We've been getting involved, meeting new people, and worshipping God ever since. Those who don't go to church, just don't get the feeling that church can give you; it's just one more thing that has made this year great.

Family
My family has been through a lot this year. My Grandma Hickey passed away in January, which was extremely hard, but it has made me realize just that much more how important family is to me. I've been able to visit with family during our vacation to North Carolina and get to know some of "the cousins" better. I've also started chatting more with my dad and Uncle Darryl on Skype. I was also able to meet more of Justin's family this year as well. He also lost a grandparent, and although the circumstances were not great, we got to visit with his family. I finally met his cousin and her little boy when we hosted them for a few days. I love how marriage has helped my family grow!

Tiffany and Jonas
I am so thankful for these great friends that they get a specail entry in this blog. I visited them in Chicago in March and was able to see their new home. I was also priviledged enough to be a part of their wedding in August. It was such a wonderful day, especially since two people that mean so much to me were married. Tiffany is a great friend, and although our relationship is different now that she is in Chicago, we are still close. I'm proud to be her "economist friend, " and I love talking about "my friends in Chicago."

Friends
I am also thankful for all my friends in general. Sarah J., Erin, James, Sarah P., Catey, Angel, Jaime, Jen, and Derek. You are all super great to me and super fun to have around. God has put some really great people in my life.

My Job
I am thankful for my job, not only because of this economy, but because of what it allows me to do. I am able to be home every evening and weekend with my husband. I was also introduced to accounting as it's applied to a business which has gotten me interesting in being a CPA. It's funny how you think you're killing time, but it leads you to the path that God has set out for you. " 'For I know tha plans I have for you,' declares the Lord. 'Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future' " Jeremiah 29:11

I know I'm forgetting a ton of great things. My life right now is just wonderful. Of course there are tough things that I endure, but the good makes them bearable. Happy Thanksgiving!

Return to Normalcy

Ah, life is back to normal. No one has died, no one is staying at my house, my calendar is not full of obligations. I sill have a lot of things coming up, it being the holidays and all, but I just don't feel so scheduled as I have lately.

For all the complaining I did, I really did enjoy having Jusitn's cousin Chrissy and her son JJ at our house. She and I were Facebook friends, and pretty close ones at that, but had never met in person. Knowing how close her and Justin were, I figured she and I would get along, but my expectations were more than exceded. She and I got along very well and it felt as if I were reuiniting with her just as the rest of Justin's family was.

And don't even get me started on JJ! He is totally at my favorite age, 16 months. He is starting to talk a little and mimics everything you do. Couple that with an awesome personality and you have the cutest kid ever! He is very easy going and friendly. It didn't take long for him to warm up to both Justin and me. By the time we had walked down to baggage claim at the airport, we were best buds. He really took to Justin while he was here, and that was just the greatest thing to see.

Chrissy's husband has interviewed for a job in Defiance, OH. If he gets it, it would bring them a little closer to us than Arizona. Not right across town or anything, but at least a visit once a month kind of distance. I really hope he gets the job. First, he needs a new job. Second, it sounds like an awesome position. And third, we can have more family around.

Currently, Justin and I are settling into our roles as small group leaders for our youth group. My group had a really good session this last week, and Justin says his went well also. Justin is driving/chaperoning a trip on Sunday to the Creation Museum in Kentucky. I will be in Stow for a family thing, but even if I wasn't I don't think I'd be interested in going. Put me down for the Intelligent Design Museum trip LOL. But I think it's great that we are getting involved and giving back. I really feel like I'm imparting some of my older wisdom to the young minds of today. Just this last week, a girl from my group who hadn't been able to attend yet this year came. The other girls introduced me and Laney as the leaders and the girl gets all excited and says, "I have cool leaders this year." Not nice to the other adults, but still made me feel pretty with it and hip.

This weekend is the annual Allen Family get together (used to be Christmas party, but then was held in October, now is done sometime in the fall). Justin isn't going because he has Modern Warfare 2 to play, plus the Iowa game. I'm bummed I will miss the game, but the Allen family thing is pretty important to me. The older I get the more I realize how rare it is to be close to extended family the way we are. I think it's partly due to the fact that when the Allens moved to Ohio, they moved together and stuck together as outsiders in a new place. Couple that with the southern tradition of family and the Scots-Irish clan mentalitly and you've got a closeness with second cousins and third cousins once removed that most can't fully understand. I hope the traditions stay in place, and I realize that my generation is the generation that can make of break it. So I go. I forgo the Iowa game and schlep myself up to Stow. I never regret it, but sometimes I have to remind myself why I do it.

Weekend from Hell

I had the worst day on Saturday and Sunday wasn't much better! A little background, Justin's grandfather passed away on Thursday and Justin's cousin and her 16 month old son were due to come stay with us on Sunday. I had plans to go to a concert (see previous post) on Friday and had volunteered to work our church's concession stand at the OSU game on Saturday. In short, I had two days to get my house clean and relatively toddler proof.

I had to be at our church at 8 AM on Sautrday morning. I got up, got dressed in my black pants and white polo (bought that week from Wal-Mart), and ate breakfast. Justin had gotten me McDonalds, and it's a good thing he did as you will read later. Justin was meeting his friend Steve at Steve's house at 8:30 or so to attend the game as well. So I get to the church and get in a van with some other workers and head to the stadium.

When we got there, we checked in and headed up to our stand which is on the A deck level. I was quickly taught the ropes of being a cashier. There was a price list, a pen, a calculator, and a pad of paper at each station. I had to rely on my mental math skills. I thought, "Oh great. This will be a challenge." At ten, the gates opened and we soon got busy. I quickly became a pro at adding up orders in my head and pouring drinks from the fountain. I'd shout "Pretzel" and "Nachos no peppers" to the runners and fulfill orders. I'd count back people's change and swipe their credit cards. I was getting the hang of it.

Saturday was a cold, rainy day in Columbus. The game against Minnesota was also a blow out. These two things combined to make being inside and getting concessions a very popular thing to do. I had a solid line of people from 10:30 until the beginning of the fourth quarter. From people who'd worked the stand before, there is usually a lull during every quarter when they take turns taking breaks and going to the restroom. We as workers were allowed two hot dogs each during our breaks. I'd also brought some money thinking I could buy myself some food. I finially got a break at the beginning of the fourth quarter, and by that time we'd run out of hot dogs at our stand, so no freebies and forget about having time to buy myself food. I went to the restroom and drank a small courtesy cup of Diet Coke. I was back at my station soon after and then the rain started. We couldn't keep coffee made and hot chocolate was selling like crazy. After the game, we closed up shop and began cleaning. We wiped down the counters and cleaned the nozzles on the soda fountains. After most of the stand was cleaned, my group walked back to the van and drove back to the church.

I got home after 5. I'd texted Justin and told him I needed to eat and he'd ordered a pizza, but both Justin and the pizza were still a long way off by the time I got home. I ate a banana and sat down. I was cranky from not eating. I was exhausted from standing and working all day. I was stressed from trying to quickly fulfill orders. I was also milling over a large to-do list before our out of town company arrived.

Justin got home and the pizza arrived. I inhaled about four pieces and tried to relax. I figured I'd give myself some time to recoup before starting to clean. Justin fell asleep and I cleaned my bathroom. I started a load of laundry with the shower curtain and bath mats. I scrubbed the shower, toilet and sink, about asphyxiating myself on bathroom cleanser fumes. I wanted to get some dusting done or the grocery shopping taken care of, but I was too exhausted.

Justin didn't see the urgency of the situation and we ended up fighting. I wanted him to show a little more of a sense of urgency, and he wanted me to stress less. His attitude was just adding to my stress. I decided to go to bed early and start fresh in the morning. I called my mom quickly to let her know that Justin's grandfather's service was scheduled for the following Thursday. As I hung up the phone I saw that my cat, Maggie was in the bedroom. I didn't want her to cry and want out in the middle of the night, thus waking me from some much needed slumber. So I tried to get her to get out of the bedroom. I stood at the door and called to her. No dice. I got some treats and tried to lure her out of the room. At this point I collapsed in the hall and started crying. I was just done. Done with the day. Justin intervened and tried to scare her out from under the bed. He shook the bed but I didn't want the middle support to become undone. He wanted the broom, but I didn't want him to scare the cat. So we ended up fighting some more. He got a hold of the cat and took her out of the room, and I went to bed where I promptly fell asleep.

Sunday was a busy day, but we got everything done. We bought some needed supplies at Target. We finished the laundry. We dusted, vacuumed, and scrubbed the kitchen floor. We had to rush, but we got some groceries in the house. We checked the status of his cousin's flight and saw it was to arrive early, so we headed to the airport around 3:30 to pick her up. The visit is going well, and our house looks nice. There was just so much stress that had to go into it!

So now we are enjoying hanging out with Justin's cousin and her son. He is so much fun to have around the house. He's very well behaved and an all around happy kid. So I guess it all turned out okay. She doesn't think we live in a pig sty, so I'm happy. I'm just never going to work the concession stand again.

Zac Brown Band show

Friday, Oct. 23rd I attended the Zac Brown Band concert with my friend Sarah. I had gotten an email from Ticketmaster with a presale code and had gotten two tickets in the 10th row of the center section. The morning I got the email I tried to coordinate something with Sarah and her husband Nathan, but niether of them would answer their phones or email, so I got two tickets for either myself and Justin or myself and Sarah. Luckily Sarah was able to go, so we had a girls' night. She is quickly becoming my concert buddy.

Last week was not a good one for me or Justin. I had been coughing and feeling sick since the Saturday before and finially was down for the count on Tuesday evening. I stayed home sick on Wednesday and Thursday hoping that I'd be back to myself by the show on Friday. I did start to feel better Thursday, but then we got the news that Justin's grandfather passed away. Justin took it very well since he'd had the last three weeks to come to terms. Still, I was not in my usual pre-concert mindset.

Come Friday I was feeling better, and Justin seemed to be dealing well, so I was able to get excited for the show. I rushed home from work, changed into jeans and my cowgirl boots and drove to pick up Sarah.

We got the the Schott right around the stated showtime and were just about to enter and find our seats when we saw the lights dim and music began to play. When they said 7:30, they meant 7:30! We found our way in the dark to an usher who showed us our seats. They weren't front row like Poison or anything, but they were a close second! 10th row was great. Far enough away so that we weren't looking straight up, but close enough that they guys looked like people, not ants.

The openers were three artists that are on Zac Brown's new label, Southern Ground. Zac himself actually took the stage with each one! The first guy, Levi Lowrey, was great. The second was a girl named Sonia Leigh, and she had a cool voice. The third was a guy named Nic Cowan, and to be honest I didn't like him as much. Just not my style.

Luckily, a fight broke out during the Nic Cowan set. I'm not sure how it started, but a guy (1) and his girlfriend (2) were having it out with two guys (3 & 4) about four rows in front of us. Guy 1 and Guy 3 were having words and Girlfriend 2 and Guy 4 were also going at it. the littlest usher I've ever seen (like 5'2") was trying to get between them. Another concert goer was trying to hold 1 or 3 back, but 1 ended up throwing a punch and bloodying 3's lip. He staggered back, and someone offered him a chair right across the aisle from us. The couple behind us tried to help him out since he was bleeding on the floor. Bloody lip guy (3) ended up sitting and bleeding behind us, while they tried to get him help as punching guy (1) was hauled away. Meanwhile, Girlfriend 2 was getting fired up and punched Guy 4. He didn't lay a hand on her, and someone pulled her away. All four ended up leaving. A chair was placed over the bloody puddle, and no one seemed to know what to do with it. You mean to tell me that there is no protocol in the Schottenstein Center for cleaning up blood? It took forever for someone to come clean it up, and even then it was a woman with gloves and a towel. Seems like there should be a bodily fluid kit with that absorbant powder stuff, gloves, and some kind of Lysol. Just saying.

In any case, the fight had died down by the time the Zac Brown Band took the stage. I've got to say that musically, that was the best show I've ever been to. The level of musicianship was unparalleled. The group of guys were so talented and true masters of their instruments and voices. I was blown away.

Like any band touring it's first album, they filled gaps with new material, but they also played covers including The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down, The Devil Went Down to Georgia, and Blackbird. I was amazed that not many people in the audience seemed to know The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down. I was the only person sitting around us singing along, even with the "na-na-na" part. The audience did react better to Devil Went Down to Georgia. The whole place went crazy and people started cheering. The fiddle player is just awesome anyway, so it was great to hear his talent showcased with that song. Again, no one seemed to recongnize Blackbird, but what can you do? Kids these days.

The musician that sang Blackbird is a guy named Clay Cook who was part of the band Lo-Fi Masters with John Mayer. He wrote with John Mayer and his material appears on Room for Squares. In any case, Clay Cook is now part of the Zac Brown Band. He has a great voice, is an awesome guitar player, and also plays the keyboard for the band. He is just another example of the tremendous level of musicianship displayed by the band that night. Truely awesome.

If I was only a casual Zac Brown Band fan before the show, I am definitely a devoted follower afterward. Those guys are not your typical country musicians. They aren't pretty. They aren't clean cut. They aren't a cog in the Nashville machine. They are guys with true talent for music and songwriting. They work hard and tour hard. I am so glad that they've found success depite the unconventional approach to country music. It reminds me of the way The Outlaws album changed the direction of country in the 70s. It wasn't typical, but it was popular. The Zac Brown Band doesn't fit an image, but it's great music. Quite resreshing to say the least.

There's not really anything big going on right now with me. There's a lot of little stuff that seems to occupy my time. Justin's grandpa is still ill and is at a rehabilitation nursing home in Pickerington. We visited last week when Justin returned from San Antonio, and Justin plans to go visit tonight.

Tonight I have my last softball game for the fall season. It is actually the make up games from a few weeks ago when we got rained out. The weather is a bit warmer, so I'm hoping it isn't quite as cold as it has been. We play an undefeated team tonight. They even beat the team that beat us last week. I hope we have a good turn out and that everyone is playing their best tonight. It'd be nice to go out on a high note. I, myself, am unsure if I'll be playing at 100%. I've had a cough and chest pains since decorating the front porch with corn stalks on Saturday. We shall see.

Later on this week, I have the Zac Brown Band concert at the Schott. I began following the band on Twitter, and saw a tweet about a street team stuffing goodie bags before the shows. I emailed my interest and I'm going to go on Friday afternoon and do that. According to the post, you get to meet the band. My friend Sarah is attending the show with me but is not able to get off work to do the goodie bags. I asked the person coordinating the thing if I'd have time to meet her before the show and she said I would. I hope it all works out. It'd be awesome to meet the band!

Saturday morning I have to be up early because I've volunteered to work the church's concession stand at OSU. They had called Justin and asked if he'd work, but he is going to the game with a coworker, so I thought I'd volunteer. I'm kind of kicking myself for several reasons. First, I don't feel well right now and the thought of getting up early to bust my ass just doesn't appeal to me. Maybe I will feel better by Saturday and this will change. Second, I forgot about the concert on Friday. I will probably be tired and not want to get up early. Third, I was informed last night that I need to wear black pants and a white polo, so looks like I have to go out this week and try to find a white polo somewherer. I'm trying to put all these things out of my head and enjoy the experience and all that. We'll see how it all works out on Saturday.

Asstastic Weekend

I had one of the best weekends I've had in a long time! After a hella creazy week (see previous posts) I was ready for some fun and some relaxation.

I'd been planning an outing to see Vince Vaughn's newest movie, Couples Retreat, for months. I'd been following the film on discussion borads and internet since its infancy, and I couldn't wait for it to come out. It was sort of my dream movie: original idea by Vince and Jon Favreau, orginal script by Favs, fined tuned by Vince and Dana Fox, directed by Peter Billingsley, and starring Vince, Favs, Faizon Love (Big Worm!), Jason Bateman, and miss Vmars herself, Kristin Bell. I wanted to do something akin to the night out I had for opening night of Wedding Crashers in '05, so I created a Facebook event and invited a bunch of friends. Approaching the date, it looked like the group wasn't going to be very big, but we had at least one couple, Sarah and Nathan, that were a definite to join us. The night of, we ended up with 8 people out for dinner at BDs Mongolian BBQ, then another two joined us for the movie.

The movie was great. I was worried that my friends would hate it since it got terrible reviews, but they enjoyed it as well. Yes, it was cheesey and a bit predictable. The editing seemed a bit sloppy in parts, but it delivered on the laughs and the story was heartfelt. One of the funniest parts is a scene in which Jon Favreau's character sets himself up for a little self-love. As the scene goes on, it becomes more apparent what he's up to, first looking at a bikini-clad girl on a brochure, then eyeing some complementary lotions, and finally grabbing some tissues and pulling his shirt over his head. Vince has his fair share of funny lines of course, and the banter between him and Favs is just great. Throw Bateman into the mix a few times, and you've got a funny movie. Oh, there is also a cameo by none other than Vernon Vaughn, Vince's dad, making his fifth appearance in Vince's films.

After the movie, we headed out with one of the couples, Catey and Ryan, to Butter's Bar in Gahanna. This used to be OUR bar. It is in Vista Plaza, near the Vistas, where Justin lived when we met and where we lived when we were first married. There have been many a night spend there and many a walk back to the apartment. It was fun for nostalgia's sake, but also fun to hang out with a couple our age and do things people our age do. We talked about work, about their wedding plans, about baseball. It was good times.

After staying out until after 2 am, we slept in on Saturday. Our plan was to do nothing on Saturday, and I'm proud to say that we accomplished our goals and then some. I made a big breakfast of pancakes, eggs, and grits for the two of us, then I decided to go back to bed and take a nap. Justin ran an errand or two, but I never left the house. I did shower, but wore warm-up pants and a sweatshirt all day. We watched the Buckeye's kick some Badger ass, ordered a pizza, and then rooted for the Hawkeyes as they defeated Michigan.

Justin left for San Antonio, Texas early Sunday morning. I went to church where I gave blood on the blood mobile for the first time since, I believe, high school. I had a couple bad experiences giving blood, and I kind of shied away from it for a bit. I tend to give quickly, and the last two times I gave in under five minutes, causing me to get light headed and feel sick. Remembering this, I told the girl as she hooked me up that I tend to give quickly and I think she slowed whatever machine they use. I didn't feel "wierd" or light headed at all. Perhaps I will give again on a more regular basis. I have a relatively rare blood type, b-, so the Red Cross used to call me often. We shall see if they begin to do so again.

Sunday night was the first official youth small groups. We decided to cover the topic of gossip. I had typed out a little worksheet of sorts to help steer the girls into discussion and try to keep them on topic. It went really well. They had a lot to stay and we talked about some really key issues like, even if it's true it's still gossip, and helping a friend by telling a trusted adult about a situation is not gossip. The girls really want to do an overnight, so we are planning on that for November and we are going to use it as a time to do a service project, putting together boxes for Operation Christmas Child.

So that was my weekend. Justin returns from San Antonio on Tuesday afternoon. His grandpa is supposed to be moved to a rehabilitation nursing home today. I haven't had an update in the last few days, so I'm not really sure where we're at with that. I think it's still touch and go. But hoepfully, our week will the a little less stressed than last.

Couples Retreat Tonight!

Couples Retreat is opening today and I've got a group to go see it tonight. Six of us are having dinner before being joined by four more for the movie. I love seeing movies with big groups of people. It reminds me of college. The movie is not getting good reviews, but I know I will enjoy it anyway. I hope my friends don't hate me afterward though.

Update on Jusitn's grandpa, he is still at Mt. Carmel East and hanging on. Today he will most likely be moving to a nursing home with hospice care. More family has been around and getting involved, so that situation has improved. We've been going to the hospital every night this week until late, so it will be nice to go out and be with friends tonight.

Taxing Week

It's only Tuesday, but this has been a taxing week. It all started on Friday when Justin and I were set to leave for Stow. I was participating in the Alzheimer's Association Memory Walk at Blossom on Saturday, so we wanted to get there Friday night. The plan was to go up on Friday, walk on Saturday, spend time with friends on Saturday night, then go to Josh's birthday party on Sunday.

Thursday night, we went to visit Justin's parents and were told that Justin's grandfather wasn't doing well at all. Justin's mom was over at his assisted living facility when we got to their house, but she came home shortly before we left. She said that it was not good and they were considering bringing in a visiting hospice care. Upon hearing that we decided not to leave Milo with them over the weekend and asked if we could stay with my sister.

On Friday night, we packed up Milo and headed to Stow. It was really up in the air about going or not going. I volunteered to go by myself just for the walk and then come home, but Justin insisted we go together and spend the weekend. Unfotunatley come Saturday night, things has turned worse and his grandpa was running a fever. We decided to head home so that we could spend the day Sunday at the assisted living place.

We were able to visit with him on Sunday, but not much. He only woke up for short periods of time. He'd wake up for a few minutes, sometimes fully lucid other times still in a daze. When we was awake and lucid, he'd joke and talk to everyone. He knew who everyone was and called them by name.

On Monday the woman that works at the assisted living place had told Justin's mom that she thought it might be beneficial to see what other measures could be taken. She convinced Justin's mom that one more last ditch effort should be taken, so they took Justin's grandpa to Mt. Carmel East. There, they determined he had pnuemonia in his left lung. Justin left work early to go be with his mom and I headed over ther after work Monday. We didn't get home until after eight.

As of now, there is really no change. It's hard to say what's going on. I'm not sure if they hope to treat the pneumonia and then release him or if they just think that it's all just part of the end.

What I really don't understand is the lack of concern on anyone's part except Justin's mom, Justin, and myself. A few of Justin's cousins visited on Sunday and his aunt has helped somewhat, but other than that everything has fallen on Justin's mom. She has spent the night with him and basically been with him since Thursday. Justin's aunt is in and out while his uncle is taking his sweet time getting in from out of town. Maybe my family is weird, but when crisis occurs in our family, we gather around eachother. I expected Justin's parents' house to be crowded with concerned family, but it's not. I thought they would all gather at the hospital, but no one was there last night besides us. The most surprising of all is the lack of support for Justin's mom by his dad and his brother. I saw Aaron for maybe a half and hour on Sunday and haven't seen Justin's dad at all. Is it jsut that my family is too close and overreacts, or is this strange?

Updates

My hope that my life would slow down after Jonas and Tiffany's wedding has been squashed by weekends scheduled to the max and weekdays that also seem to fill themselves with things to do. I've been traveling to my mom and dad's about every other week since August. We went up for my mom's birthday in mid-August, were back the first weekend of September for my cousin's wedding, I was just up again this weekend for the bi-annual Allen ladies luncheon, and we plan on returning the weekend of the 3rd for the Alzheimer's Walk and Josh's birthday. The weekends in between have been filled with catching up on chores, laundry, and grocery shopping. There has been little time for the relaxing, do-nothing all day kind of weekend I've been craving since May.

I started playing Fall Softball last week, and I'm proud to report that the Bad News Bears are 2-0! This is already an improvement over our spring/summer season. We seem to have a pretty good team, I just hope that everyone is able to play each week. We're already threatened by injuries and people who can't commit to playing every week. It really doesn't matter if we win or lose though, since I really just enjoy playing. I like being part of a team again and getting a little exercise. I also enjoy meeting new people. Megan, our team captain, had a birthday/USC party that Justin and I attended, and it was so much fun to be around other couples and meeting new people. I think we need more of that.

This Sunday will be the first time Justin and I will be leading the youth small groups at church. Every other Sunday, the youth group breaks into small groups to discuss and delve into issues that the kids want to address. It's split up between gender and age. Justin is leading the 9th and 10th grade guys with a man from church named Scott. I am leading the 9th and 10th grade girls with a woman named Laney. I only met her briefly at the first meeting, but she is twenty-something and a relatively newlywed like myself. I think she and I will have a lot in common and I think we'll do a great job our group. It would also be nice if she and I were able to strike up a frienship.

Our church is looking to start a young couple's group, and I hope it gets off the ground. I'd love to meet other couples to hang out with. Don't get me wrong, we like the friends that we have, I'm just always open to expand our circle. It would also be nice to meet couples without kids. Even though Justin and I plan to be a couple with kids eventually, right now we are childless and it would be nice to have friends who were also in that position.

It'd also be nice to have friends who were in the same boat as far as trying to get pregnant. My friends that have kids now all seem to have gotten pregnant on accident, so they just don't understand the way I feel or what I'm going through. I have a couple friends from high school that I talk to on facebook about trying and my lack of success, but that can only go so far.

Despite being busy, things are going well right now. The creazyness and hectic pace lead to some pretty fun stuff. I'm excited for Fall to start in full swing and go on into the winter. I hope the fun activities continue, but maybe they could leave a few days in there when I can do nothing :)

Lots happening

I say this almost everytime I blog, but I need to blog more often. I sit at my desk every day for lunch. I don't know why I don't use that time once a week or so and just update a little. Oh well, we'll try.
My summer has been very busy, but very fun. It began in May with our yearly trip to North Carolina. We had a good time for the most part, but it wasn't as fun as the previous year. There were more family members there, which I attribute to Grandma Hickey's passing. My sister and brother-in-law came this year with Josh, and that was really the reason Justin and I didn't enjoy ourselves as much. We do not get along with my brother-in-law. He annoyed us when he was around, and when we avoided him people got mad. We just couldn't win. And in avoiding him, we ended up avoiding my parents which is half the fun of going down, spending time with Mom and Dad. The thing that bothered me most is that my brother-in-law acts as if he's doing someone a big favor anytime he's around my family. It's like he's playing the martyr. Like he really didn't want to be on vacation here, but he's doing it because my sister wanted to and because my Dad is sick, and because Grandma died this year. Justin and I truely enjoy the calmness of Murphy and enjoy spending time with my parents since we don't live right down the street from them. We'll see who decides to go next year and then plan our trip accordingly. We might end up in a different house or we may decide to go down at a completely different time.
June was also busy. Tiffany's bridal shower was toward the end of June in Fremont, OH. I traveled there for the afternoon, then went from there to my mom and dad's to spend a little time with them and my grandma. The last weekend of June, I threw Justin a surprise 30th birthday party. It was so stressful getting everything planned and coordinated, but he was surprised and the party was a hit. It was a great night and Justin refers to it as "The best birthday ever."
The big event in July was Tiffany's bachelorette weekend in Chicago. Again, it was a lot of planning and coordinating, but it worked out well and was fun. I really enjoy traveling by myself, which I never thought I would. Flights to Chicago are so cheap, it makes a really fun little trip. I'm going to try not to invite myself over to Tiffany's too often, though it's so tempting to just get on a plane and get away for a little while.
Tiffany and Jonas' wedding is this coming weekend. I'm excited for it, and I'm also ready for it to be over with. There's just been so much going on surrounding it and so much drama and planning and drama and money and drama. I am reminded at least daily why I decided to get married and Vegas and why I didn't bring any bridesmaids or friends with me. But I am happy to be a part of Tiffany and Jonas' day, and I wouldn't have dreamt of saying no. I love them both very much and I'm happy the asked me to be part of it. Still, it has run its course and I am ready for all the planning and hard work to come to fruition.
Justin and I are also getting more involved at our new church. We didn't attend as much as I would have liked this summer. All the events and the traveling really made it difficult to go. But I was able to teach Sunday school to the 2s and Ts class three times. I taught the first two weeks of June and then again just yesterday. It was fun and it felt good to be around kids again. I thought about signing up to teach some throughout the school year, but I'm not sure it's a comittment I want to make.
Instead, Justin and I have decided to become small group leaders for the youth group. Our church has a large youth group with about 90 or so kids. Two Sundays a month they do an activity for youth group and the other two Sundays they do small groups. The groups are divided by age and gender and they're really kind of an open format. It's not really a Sunday school or a Bible study, just more of an open discussion forum on what matters to the youth. I'm not sure yet where each of us will be, but we're excited to get to know the kids and see where it goes.
Justin and I have also started Power 90, a 90 day in-home boot camp. We'd gotten bored with Weight Watchers and needed some sort of work out program. We'd kicked around the idea of joining a gym, but weren't sure of the expense and anything we tried like biking or walking just didn't pan out. Justin had seen P90X on TV, but after looking into it, we realized we needed something to get us in shape before going to that. I asked a friend from high school about the Beachbody programs since he'd had a lot of success with them. He recommended Power 90. So we ordered it and have completed one week so far. I think it's a program we can stick to and we'll see what kind of success we get from it.
Well, there's where my life has been. There's where it's headed. I'll try to keep it up-to-date from now on.

Chicago

It's been over a week since my adventure in Chicagoland (they actually call it that), but I am just now getting around to blogging about it. I also have pictures to post on FaceBook, but I have yet to that as well. I've been neglecting the blog in general lately mostly because I haven't had much blog worthy to write about. In any case, a blog of my trip follows:

Every year, my in-laws ask for a Christmas list. Being 27 years old, I find this challenging every year. I haven't come up with a true Christmas list since I was maybe 10 years old, but I've been reluctantly doing it the last three years. The list is usually small and not well thought out, but my mother-in-law always gets me awesome things anyway (yay Kitchenaid mixer!). Well, this year I was thinking about it and I reached deep down into myself and found the ten year old that used to ask for outlandish and selfish things. She shouted at me rather matter-of-factly, "A gift card for Southwest to use for a trip to see Tiffany and Jonas!" And low and behold, that's what I got for Christmas. Actually, I got a Visa gift card from my in-laws and a Southwest card from my sister. I was good to go! Tiffany and I decided that spring would be a good time for the trip, and Jonas recommended that I come before the Edvard Munch exhibit left the Art Institute in April. So we decided upon the last weekend of March.

I flew out Friday night on probably the best flight of my life. The duration of a flight from Port Columbus to Chicago Midway is about 50 minutes. My particular flight encountered some turbulence; this combined with the shortness of the flight led the captain to decide not to serve drinks on the flight. This worked out perfectly for me. I was tired after a day of work and waiting around in the airport, so I leaned on the window and fell asleep. Without the disturbance of a drink cart and flight attendant, I slept the entire flight. I woke up to an announcement of our arrival into Chicago. It was surreal. I didn't remember a thing! Plus, after factoring in the time change, I got to Chicago before I left. Quite nice.

Tiffany and Jonas had taken to train to Midway to meet me. They greeted me with a three day CTA Pass and we were off. We got on the train and Jonas pointed out various buildings and landmarks, despite the difficulty seeing them in the dark. It was nice though and gave me a taste of the plethora of Chicago information I would glean from him the rest of the trip. We transferred from the Orange Line to the Red Line that eventually took us to Tiffany and Jonas's neighborhood in Uptown.

The couple's apartment was located in a nice residential neighborhood full of 1920s and 1930s buildings and houses. We entered through a gate into the courtyard of their building and then entered their apartment. I expected a teenie-tiny "urban" apartment. You know, the ones you hear horror stories about from New Yorkers. But I was pleasantly surprised to see a large light filled apartment.

That night, we went to a lesbian bar (now that I say that, I'm not sure it was an actual "lesbian bar," but in the least it was a bar with many lesbian waitresses and patrons) and had a really good pizza. It wasn't Chicago style deep dish, but it suited me just fine. I probably couldn't handle all the fresh tomatoes that generally top a Chicago style pizza anyway. Our pizza did have really good veggies including broccoli and lots of cheese. It was a good way to end a long day.

Saturday was a fun day. We began the day by doing a little shopping. We went into a few boutique-type shops as well as many shoe stores. Jonas, ever the shoe salesman, tried to talk me into a pair of knee-high black suede wedged boots. They fit well and were a good price, but just not very practical. I did buy a scarf and an awesome purse hook. After that, we continued onto Navy Pier via the train and CTA bus. It was quite cold and I imagine Navy Pier is much more enjoyable in nice weather. We were unable to ride the Ferris Wheel since the weather kept it from being open, but I did find Justin a Bears shirt, bought my nephew a post card, and saw the stained-glass museum that is located there. I love stained glass, especially Tiffany glass with it's art nouveau style. After Navy Pier we went to Millennium Park for a visit cut short by the weather before we began our journey to the Second City training stage.

Tiffany had gotten us tickets to see a Second City show on their training stage. The main stage was currently showing a satire on the Illinois governor and Tiffany figured I wouldn't really find it that funny. I was happy with her choice of Rubbed. It was a musical about a man who turns to selling marijuana and discovers a genie in his bong. The genie teaches him valuable life lessons about happiness and contentment. It was funny and entertaining. Very good time. After the show, we ate at Dinotto, an Italian restaurant around the corner. It was Earth Hour and the restaurant was participating, so we enjoyed our dinner by candlelight.

On Sunday, Jonas had to work at the Art Institute so it was a girl day. Despite the snow, we ventured out to have a fun day. Tiffany and I went to the Chicago History Museum. It was really nice and very informative. They had a collection of Lincoln artifacts, which was very cool. After the museum, we started walking along Lincoln Park toward some cool shopping. We found lots of cool shops and an awesome Belgian waffle place. We walked quite far, but it was a nice afternoon. We went back to the apartment and waited for Jonas to get home from work before going to a burger place in their neighborhood for dinner.

I had taken Monday off work, and wasn't leaving Chicago until later in the evening. So Monday, Jonas and I were able to hang out most of the day while Tiffany worked. I hadn't spent any time with just Jonas since he moved to Cleveland from Rosehill Plaza. For those who don't know, Jonas lived across the hall from me for a few years while Tiffany finished her masters at Case. So while Tiffany and I are old college buds, I have a relationship with Jonas separate from Tiffany. Tiffany's co-workers thought it odd that I was going to spend the day with Jonas while she worked. From an outsider's prospective, this would seem weird, but the three of us never thought anything of it.

Jonas and I set off for the Art Institute early in the morning. We got downtown too early, so we took the opportunity to see Millennium Park in the sunshine. We also went across the street to an old library building that is now a cultural center. It is home to the largest Tiffany glass dome. It was gorgeous, and the room itself is beautiful as well with mosaic tiled walls.

We then proceeded to the Art Institute where Jonas was able to get me in for free. We saw an exhibit of photographer Yousuf Karsh who photographed many personalities of the 20th Century. I was also surprised to see pieces that I didn't know were housed there, like Edward Hopper's Nighthawks and Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte by Georges Seurat (dodges things thrown by Ferris Beuller fans). American Gothic was on loan, so I wasn't able to see that which bummed me out. But the Edvard Munch exhibit was definitely worth timing my trip to see. I have to say that I didn't know (or perhaps more accurately: remember) much beyond The Scream, but I now have a really great appreciation for him as an artist. The exhibit was organized by theme. For example, all of his works pertaining to romance were in a room together, the ones showing angst in another. They also had works by Munch's contemporaries of the same theme in the room to show comparison. While I like Munch's dark side, it was nice to see that some of his work wasn't so "emo." I am really glad Jonas got me into the museum and showed me the exhibit. It was really a good day.

In all, I had a great trip. Despite some rain and snow, Tiffany and Jonas taught me how to get around town like a native. I enjoyed riding the train. I was also pleased to see that what people say about Chicago is true. It's a large city with a Midwestern feel. People were friendly like the guys at the waffle shop and the woman at Corner Bakery who offered to foot the bill for my sweater that I snagged in the bathroom. It was fun to get away for a weekend, see some sites, get a mental workout, and spend time with friends. I hope to make it back and bring my husband along for the ride.